Friday, 8 July 2011

Five Things You Did When You Were Twenty

Today I've turned 40. There's no denying it any longer, I'm middle aged :). Happy birthday to me. Today's from the vault is something from 1971. ME!

Five things you did when you were 20 that you can't do when you're 40.

1.   Come home at 5am after dancing all night, catch a couple of hours sleep then get up and go to work.
2.   Grab a works hot dog at the dodgy little van parked out the back of the pub at 3am and eat it walking home, with no discernable tightening of your waistband, nor any fear of food poisoning.
3.   If by chance you do not finish aforementioned hot dog, a twenty year old finds it perfectly acceptable to put it in the fridge and have for brunch the next day. The 40 year old in me shudders.
4.   Collect your pay on Friday (cash in an envelope people!), stick it in your purse, see the purse empty by Sunday and not worry a bit. Because more was coming next Friday, after all.
5.   Think to yourself: Hey I've got years before I worry about that yet! That only happens to old people.

Five things you do when you're 40 you never imagined you'd do when you were 20:

1.  Bitch at the cost of everything from petrol to bananas.
2.  Take special vitamins with pink labels that claim they'll elevate everything from your mood to your IQ. Then bitch that you wouldn't have to take this stuff if you could just afford to buy bananas.
3.  Exclaim 'Oh God is that the time?!' when the clock strikes 10pm, then rush off to bed because you've got to get up early the next day.
4.  Get up early all the time.
5.  Say things like: 'I'm only trying to help you'/'I've got 34 years on you kid, don't mess with me'/'I can't do that I'll put my back out'/'I remember when I could buy a banana for 20cents'.

Have a great weekend people. I'll be celebrating--well, as much celebrating as I can get in before 10pm.



  1. Huh, you also can't look in the mirror at age 20 and find yet another wrinkle that wasn't there yesterday.